Alone At Last Read online

  She was beautiful.

  The fact had struck him head-on when he walked into the living room. He hadn’t been expecting anyone to be home, least of all someone that didn’t actually live in the house he shared with his mother, her new husband, and his little sister. Hope looked up from the book she’d been reading and smiled.

  He couldn’t find any words for a second. All his mind could register, after a day of boring professors pumping him full of pertinent information, was the way her jeans hugged her thighs and her exposed navel below the black t-shirt.

  “Uh…hi,” she said sticking her finger in the novel.

  “Where’s Val?” James asked dropping his bag on the opposite end of the couch.

  “French Club,” Hope answered.

  “You’re not in French Club? I thought you two did everything together.”

  Hope’s gaze dropped and he followed it to the cover of the book. He recognized it, The Scarlett Letter.

  Ah, he thought, senior year Advanced Placement English with Mrs. Pierce. Been there…done that.

  “We’re both in French Club…but unlike Val, I’m not the president. I’m the vice-president and I can skip it as long as she attends…especially since I have an English final tomorrow.”

  James nodded. “I’m going to grab something to eat before my mom gets home. You want anything?”

  “No, thanks.”

  She opened the book again and started reading. James cursed himself as he made his turkey sandwich. Why was he so preoccupied with this girl?

  He had a girlfriend…a girlfriend he didn’t really have time for, much to her chagrin. She was cute, long brown hair and big green eyes, body of a Victoria’s Secret model…but she was a distraction; which was a good thing and a bad thing. She rented her own apartment downtown where he stayed if things got too intense at home. Yet here he was…practically drooling over some barely legal kid.

  “Hey,” Hope said startling him enough to drop the knife. “Sorry,” she said as it clattered its way into the sink. “Val just called. She said the meeting is running over because they’re planning the end of the year trip. She’s getting dropped off later and I really should get home for dinner.”

  “You can eat here,” James offered before he could stop himself.

  Hope laughed. “If my parents knew I was over here without Val, they’d think I was avoiding them or something.” She dropped her gaze to the floor and shrugged. “It’ll just be easier if I go home.”

  “I’ll drive you,” James said, once again without censor.

  “But your sandwich,” Hope said pointing at the plate on the counter.

  “I’ll eat and drive.” He’d forgotten all about the hunger that had cramped his stomach the entire ride home. In fact, since he’d seen Hope, his stomach had begun acrobatics instead of growling. “Go get your stuff and I’ll write a note to Mom about Val.”

  “Okay,” said Hope with a shy smile, “Thanks.”

  The turkey sandwich was gone by the time James backed his battered, green Honda Civic out of the garage. He’d inhaled it without tasting anything.

  “Were you and Val going to study tonight?” he asked glancing at her.

  “No.”

  James frowned. How was he going to ask his question without sounding like an ass?

  “So, you took the bus to our house just to sit alone?”

  Hope fingered her hair, which hung past the block letters on her GAP t-shirt. She gazed out the window and didn’t say anything for a minute or so. “Sometimes it’s easier to be alone in someone else’s house…where the walls can keep their secrets.”

  That startled James. Her response was way too mature for an eighteen year old, and her voice was laced with sadness. He gazed at Hope as they cruised to a stop at a red light. “I know what you mean.”

  She smiled again but glanced away when she saw him looking at her.

  James knew that Hope’s family life was hard. Val had shared enough for him to get the picture, without betraying all her best friend’s secrets. Hope didn’t know her father and was more of a burden than a daughter to her mother. She was expected to bring home good grades and make no waves. Hope couldn’t date, she couldn’t argue, she couldn’t breathe freely.

  Things had gotten worse since her mother married. Hope’s stepfather was a chauvinist who relished controlling her and her mother. He’d overheard Hope crying to Val after her stepfather had slapped her for burning dinner. He wasn’t the only violent one—her mother had given her a swelled lip once, and a black eye. Add that kind of violence to the constant belittling of her intelligence and looks, and James didn’t know why she ever went back to that so-called home.

  Not that his own home was all sunshine and roses…full of frosty silence and a growing chasm between him and Val and their mother. Georgia had chosen her new husband—who happened to be ten years her junior—over her children a few too many times for them to pretend to be a family ever again. Their dad, Parker Murdock, had been out of the picture since the divorce…no visitation…just child support payments. They hadn’t felt the loss as much as their mother. Especially, after Parker made his first million running a small chain of fitness centers. The support checks got larger, but so did Georgia’s resentment. She’d flown completely off the handle when their father had shown up to his high school graduation and informed her that he would be making all the financial moves to put James and Val through college. Security had to escort her from the reception. Parker may not have been a ‘fishing on Saturday mornings’ kind of father, but his children would have the best education he could afford.

  “Anyway, thanks for the ride,” said Hope as her cheeks blushed.

  It was his turn to shrug. “Better than the bus, I guess.”

  “Much better,” Hope muttered.

  James pretended he didn’t hear her. “I was on the way out anyway, I’ve got to stop by and see my girl.”

  Hope didn’t speak again for the rest of the drive, until she muttered goodbye, got out of the car, and jogged up the bush-lined driveway.

  James downed the water and put the empty glass on the table.

  He smiled as the remnants of the memory of eighteen-year-old Hope vaporized. He’d been distracted by her then, but now…now she was even more beautiful. Her hips were fuller, as were her breasts. She wore flattering clothes…not that she needed to wear clothes—ever.

  His mind wandered to Hope lying upstairs, still naked. He adjusted his erection as he walked to the sink to deposit the glass. He took the stairs two at a time. The girl he’d been afraid to touch was now the woman he never wanted to stop touching. He wasn’t going to waste another minute away from her.

  Chapter Seven

  The next morning, Hope was on the phone with Val while James returned a call from his answering service.

  “Doctor Murdock?” the woman on the line said when she picked up.

  “Yes, Ms. Wilkes.”

  “I’m so glad you returned my call. I apologize for interrupting your vacation.”

  “Get to the point, Ms. Wilkes.”

  “The Rogoff child,” she started, “is in serious condition. The police are requesting our files on the family and you never sent us a written report on Marianne’s broken arm.”

  His jaw transformed into a vice. “I faxed that write-up the same day I made the report on your hotline.”

  “Okay, well…it’s not on file in our office so…”

  James had run out of patience. “When you and I last spoke, you were assuring me that my suspicions were unfounded. Those people convinced you that four bone fractures were the result of an overly rambunctious three-year-old. So don’t you dare question whether or not I went about making my report correctly! I’m not the one who dropped the ball here!”

  “Look, doctor, my case load is more than you could ever imagine. I deal with serious cases of physical, sexual abuse, and gross neglect. I’m monitoring foster families and clueless teenage mothers! Don’t you dare accuse me of dropp
ing the ball when I have so many to juggle! You can sit on your high horse and say whatever you like as long as that paperwork gets faxed!”

  James sighed. There was no sense in pointing fingers. What was done was done. Now, he had to do his part in making sure the person or people responsible didn’t get away with it.

  “I’ll fax it again next Monday when I get back.”

  “This can’t wait that long!” she snapped. “Can’t someone from your office fax it?”

  “I can’t do that! Have you ever heard of doctor-patient confidentiality? If I have someone else handle that document and the couple sweet talks their way out of this too, I’m looking at a Privacy Act Violation law suit. I can’t afford that.”

  There was a tense silence before she responded. “This is a police matter, whatever grudge you have against me aside, the authorities need that document.”

  “Then you have them call me. Until then, why don’t you keep looking for the one I sent last year?”

  James held the phone away from his ear when she clicked off.

  “Maybe you shouldn’t have been so hard on her,” said Hope. “Social work is a low-paying, high-stress, thankless job.”

  “I know that and I hate to be so cold, but this isn’t just some case number. I was there for every checkup since birth for these kids and to imagine that the entire time someone was hurting them, makes me sick.”

  She put her hand on his forearm and smiled up at him. “Tell me how I can make you feel better. More chicken and dumplings?”

  He smiled. “Why don’t we go upstairs and see if you can find a way to kiss it and make it better?”

  “Are you saying you want to play doctor with me?” Hope teased.

  “Only if you bend over and say—”

  “Doctor Murdock!” Hope squealed. “I am appalled at your behavior…what happened to the serious caretaker I used to know?”

  “You didn’t know him well enough before; now tell me how you want your temperature taken.”

  “I have to go to my office to get out some paperwork,” James said brushing her hair from her eyes.

  “You’re driving back to fax the report, huh?”

  He sighed. “Yeah.”

  Hope smiled. “I think that’s a good idea.”

  “I don’t want to leave you here alone.”

  “It’s okay; Val and P.J. will arrive in a few hours. I won’t be alone for long.”

  She was running her fingertips through the sparse hairs on his chest, driving him to distraction. “Maybe I should take you with me.”

  “Don’t be silly,” Hope giggled. “I’ll be here when you get back tomorrow.”

  “I’m not coming back tomorrow.”

  He felt her hand still and explained himself before she could ask.

  “I’ll be back tonight.”

  “That’s over six hours of driving. That’s crazy.”

  “No, what’s crazy is leaving you here to get second thoughts about getting involved with me and changing our friendship.”

  “You mean upgrading our relationship?”

  “Upgrading?”

  “Yeah, any time great sex is added to an equation, I consider it upgraded.”

  His laugh rumbled through his chest. She could feel it under her palm.

  Hope closed her eyes and felt him. A sense of peace consumed her. How exactly had her dream come true? All the nights she’d spent alone in her bed, wishing to be with James and now she was. She pressed her nose to his neck trying to memorize the moment—his hand in her hair, the way he smiled, the way his leg weighed over hers. This was her perfect moment.

  When he’d pulled out of the drive, Hope hurried into the house and found her cell phone. She was going to call Val and find out how much longer until they arrived.

  She knew it wasn’t logical to be so nervous about being alone. She was a grown woman after all. But for some reason, she was.

  There were times, like when a guy wanted to come over and she’d turn him down with the excuse that she didn’t want to disturb her roommate, that she wondered why she and Val couldn’t be best friends in separate apartments. She’d constantly reminded herself that living with a roommate was financially responsible. They were best friends, they got along great, and they split the bills. They saved money and always had each other.

  Deep down, she knew that she just didn’t want to be alone. She’d grown up an only child, only able to depend on herself. She spent hours alone in the house while her mom and stepdad worked overtime or went on romantic dates. They didn’t go out to dinner as a family, ever. At first, that had upset her. Her stepdad would toss her a twenty and tell her to order a pizza while they were gone.

  She had felt left out and would stew in anger. Then, as she got older, she stopped caring. She was able to cook for herself, so she did. She’d sit down and eat while she read a novel or watched television. Sometimes, she’d convince them to let Val sleep over with her. Most times her mother would refuse, saying that she didn’t want two girls alone in her house to invite boys over. Other times, her stepdad would insist on Val keeping her company so they could get a hotel room for the night. They didn’t realize that she knew exactly what they were doing, but she did…and it grossed her out immensely.

  These days, she didn’t like being alone with her thoughts for too long. She’d actually been dreading the day that P.J. would ask Val to move in with him or propose marriage and she’d be left alone…again.

  Chapter Eight

  Val dropped her bag in front of the door and hugged Hope. “Did you miss me, ma?”

  “Not at all,” Hope laughed.

  “Yeah, I’ll bet! Where the hell is my big brother anyway?” Val said walking past Hope into the living room.

  “He drove back to the city this morning.”

  Val frowned. “What? Why? Was he upset because we hadn’t gotten here yet?”

  “No. He had something to do at the office, but he’ll be back tonight.”

  P.J., arms full of luggage, clamored into the house stumbling over Val’s bag. “Damn it, Valerie, are you trying to kill me?”

  “Obviously, I’m not trying hard enough!” she snapped rolling her eyes.

  “One of these days,” P.J. groused moving the bags and putting his own with them at the bottom of the staircase.

  “My ass!” Val challenged.

  They were such a strange, yet fitting couple. Both Val and P.J. were extremely attractive. Val had long, dark blonde hair, peaches and cream complexion, and expressive hazel eyes. Paolo Joaquin Rayez, aka P.J. was the opposite of Val’s pale beauty. He was tall, dark, and handsome; ink black hair, russet skin, and light brown eyes that almost matched Val’s. He was the same height as James, but a bit more broad and brawny.

  P.J. grabbed Hope in a rough, friendly hug and kissed her cheek. “Thank God you’re here, Hope. You can keep her off my back!”

  Val snorted. “You could just learn to watch your mouth.”

  Hope sighed. “Could you two stop with the foreplay? Dinner is going to get cold.”

  “Wonderful!” exclaimed Val, “I’m starved.”

  “I’ll put the bags upstairs and meet you guys in the kitchen.”

  Hope gave P.J. directions to the room he would be sharing with Val, and then started to follow her best friend through the living room and into the kitchen. However, her cell rang in her pocket before she got into the kitchen.

  Her hands shook when she saw who was calling on the display screen.

  “Hi, sweetheart,” James said softly and her heart accelerated.

  “Hi.”

  “I’m leaving the office and I’m heading back to the cabin.”

  “Cool.” She fidgeted with her hair, annoyed that her brain could only form one word answers.

  “Is Val there yet?”

  “Yeah, they just got in.”

  “Let me talk to her.”

  “Uh…okay.” Hope took the phone into the kitchen where Val was stirring the stock pot full of Br
unswick stew. She gave her a curious look but covered the pot and accepted the phone.

  “James?” she said after a few seconds. “Why are you calling Hope’s phone?”

  She was silent as Hope began filling bowls with the hearty stew…and eavesdropping, of course.

  “I did not…no…I promise...are you kidding me…you two did what?!”

  Hope felt Val’s gaze boring into her but she refused to look up and meet her eyes.

  “Fine, I’ll see you when you get here.” Val disconnected the call and grinned at her best friend. “Hope Danielle Brewer! You finally, finally got some dick! I’m so proud of you.”

  Hope glared at her. “Tell the whole damn world, Valerie Lynne Murdock!”

  “What? Only the deer can hear!”

  “And me!” P.J. announced as he hit the bottom step.

  “Shit,” Hope snapped, her face going completely red.

  “I can’t believe it finally happened,” Val said ignoring Hope’s mortified expression. “You and James—God—I just love it!”

  “Do you realize you’re talking about your brother?” asked Hope.

  “Face it,” P.J. said, “the both of you needed it.” He claimed his bowl and headed for the kitchen table.

  “I’m not exactly comfortable with everyone discussing my sex life in an open forum!” Hope proclaimed.

  “So what; now that you’ve actually got a sex life to talk about it’s off limits?” Val squawked.

  P.J. chuckled.

  Hope snatched her phone from Val and headed for the staircase.

  “And you say I need to learn to watch my mouth?” Hope heard P.J. ask behind her.

  It took ten minutes for Val to find Hope’s room.

  “Are you mad at me?” she asked when Hope called for her to come in.

  Hope put down her brush and sighed. “You know I’m not mad…it’s just…”

  “I know. I embarrassed you and I’m sorry.”

  Val slid onto the bed beside her.

  “I’m used to you embarrassing me,” Hope said with a sigh. “I’m just not used to being set up like this.”